It’s been twenty years since her mother was photographed, blood-soaked, outside the family home. A famous TV food personality, she fled the country. Since that time, the girl has grown up. She’s bought an apartment, learned her own cooking style, fallen in love. She lives a quiet life, working as a copywriter for a health insurance company. She’s found happiness, finally.

But strange things are in the air. Her easygoing boyfriend has started sleeping with men. Her mother is selling the infamous family home. And a glamorous, pregnant neighbour has moved into the apartment downstairs, calling into question everything the girl believes about her own desires.

Among conspiracies, dubious loyalties, and mercenary impulses, how do we work out who is worthy of our devotion and who is just a fan? Shirley charts a search for meaning in a world where the fracturing of ambitions – work and purpose, real estate and home, family and love – has left us uncertain how to recognise ourselves.

Popularised by the Dunbar Number, which suggests that our cognitive limit for maintaining stable social relationships is around 150 people, this book is a fascinating if highly cerebral and scientific take on friendship, trust, loneliness and social cohesion. Its academic exploration provides a practical guide  and homage to human connection for anyone looking to understand the nuances of friendship groups.

Promoted as a book to counteract self-sabotage, it actually covers many aspects of life including happiness, decluttering, denial, procrastination, finding inner peace, trusting yourself and so on. If you are an avid self help book reader it may feel like many well-worn concepts that have been repackaged into a booklet without chapters that speaks like the Tao Te Ching. While we may well be responsible for our own lives, the emphasis on personal responsibility could feel overwhelming or dismissive of the complex factors that contribute to mental health struggles, including the society we operate in.

A foundational book in understanding the interplay between emotions and intelligence. Provides valuable insights into improving emotional skills and emotional competence. Emphasis self-awareness and self-regulation and expands into organizations aiming to cultivate a more emotionally intelligent workforce.