Dating
October 22nd 2020
Hey there Caddyshackers
It is true that 2020 has served up its fair share of challenges.
The rules of the game as we knew it have been changed. The same is true of the dating game.
Way back in May, we saw new “guidelines” coming out around casual hook ups and COVID 19.
The baffling question was how do you stay 1.5m away from a partner during sex and is sex with a mask a thing?
Dating Apps
Dating apps are developing faster than we can keep a finger on the download button, and they are each vying for their piece of the love (or lust) pie.
They need a point of difference, and we thought we would share our latest find with you.
Bring on guest blogger Jen, thanks for the input Jen, love your work and style.
Dating app with STI vertification
Did you know about the new(ish) app NeatClub (now called Ashkah Shah after the founder) which is a dating app with STI verification, set to rival Tinder? Nope we didn’t either.
It’s promoted as a club for people who love having sex but like to have sex safely to reduce the risk of getting infected by STIs. So far, so good.
The process;
You get tested for the STIs as recommended by the app every four months and get certified results including HIV, Herpes, Gonorrhea, Chlamydia, Syphilis, Hepatitis A, B & C.
You provide authorization to the app and permission to collect your information.
The app folks will then do the legwork of collecting the test result and verifying it.
Straddling (sorry) the medical data space and social space, it seems like a great idea.
You get to protect yourself from people who have tested positive for STIs but are not disclosing their status. Happens. Or a lot of people don’t know their STI status because they are not testing regularly enough or not at all.
We all know that condoms are great but not always enough protection, as you can still become infected from skin to skin contact and oral sex. What about getting infected from people who are asymptomatic (meaning they don’t show any symptoms) and don’t know that they have an STI, like chlamydia.
Ashka designed the app to remove awkwardness and make it easy to share test results without killing the romance. Fair enough, totally get that.
And yet a solid google around this shows very little activity since 2017, including one unavailable YouTube clip and 7 tweets and nowhere to actually download the app.
As a start-up, did the idea just not get enough backing or is it an idea whose time is actually too early and for now not high on the acceptability/ useability scale?
To flip the whole concept there are already dating apps for people who do have STIs. To date (sorry, again) Positive Singles has almost 2 million users.
Tinder, Bumble and Grindr have transformed the way people date and have sex, providing access to wider networks of people with a swipe. Cool, all about choices.
It’s not about blaming apps for the rise in STIs, people have always been having sex and will continue to do so.
The future probably holds even smarter tech interface that will allow us to scan people for all sorts of things (won’t that be an ethical and legal minefield).
Conversely, apps such as these will have their detractors such as people living with an STI who prefer to negotiate the dating and hook up space without having to prove their status.
Like any aspect of who you are, you don’t have to disclose to everyone, and when you do disclose, it should be when you’re comfortable doing so.
I like a good parallel as much as I like a good metaphor.
So…would we want or approve of an app that provided your health status for other examples? Living with cancer, a disability or an auto immune disease?
There are no easy answers, other than to, as ever, treat one another with the respect, dignity and kindness that we all deserve when navigating any sensitive space.
What we are loving right now
In regards to respect, dignity and kindness we are loving the term RAKtivist. That is, a Random Acts of Kindness activist.
You never know how much your one small deed could change a life. Small act for you, life changing effect for them.
What will your RAKtivist pledge be today? Get some ideas and check out The Kind Blog. Kindness the norm. Sign us up!
Until next time
Peace, Love & Protection
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